Jacob has been making some fantastic progress. Five years of therapies and programs and attempts to teach him basic skills with very little improvement has been so discouraging. And in the past few weeks he has exploded with understanding and compliance.
We have had very few aggressive outbursts, which has made a world of difference for us here at home. A few months ago,when Jacob seemed to be attacking Madison nearly every time he saw her, we knew something needed to change quickly. Chris and I sat down with Tyler and Maddie and talked about what we could do to help Jacob be more gentle and how to deflect his hitting and pushing and steamrolling without running away and yelling, which just seems to encourage him more.
Our solution was that whenever Jacob started coming towards one of the other kids, they would put their arms out to hug him, and tell him he's a good boy and that they love him. Tyler and Madison worked really hard to do this, and after a few weeks we noticed a difference. Jacob was responding and enjoying the reaction he was getting from being affectionate more than the previous reaction that he was used to. And now he wants to hug every chance he gets. He still rams into you unaware of the force behind his size, and we all have to be prepared to get knocked off balance, but it is a huge improvement and we are very pleased.
Jacob's receptive language is increasing more and more every day. We have been using the same terms and simple 3 word commands for so long. Years of Jacob only understanding the most basic requests had us doubting he'd learn to communicate any better. But, miracle of miracles, he is responding to our speech and surprising us every day.
Although his expressive language has not changed, this surge of understanding has made daily life much easier. We are more able to request things of him, and he is realizing what we expect.
Doesn't mean he always listens, autistic kids have a remarkable way of completely ignoring you, acting like you are not even there, when they are focusing on something else.
Jacob has had a fascination with Spongebob for several years. He has been drawing Spongebob and Gary over and over, improving the detail of his art each time. A few days ago I was trying to distract him from TV for a bit, and we got down on the floor to draw. I asked him to draw Spongebob, which he easily does on request, and then I continued with the other cartoon characters. I know he recognizes them by picture, but I was unsure if he would recognize them by name only. As I said, "Draw Squidward" (and Mr. Crabs, Patrick, Plankton, a Crabby Patty, a car, school bus) he knew exactly what I was asking of him and drew them all. And today we had a sitter here for a few hours, and she asked him to draw a flower, and he did. It proves how much he is beginning to understand words, and it is making me incredibly happy.
He has been stuck at the developmental age of about 18 months old for 5 years. All these years of trying to teach him these same things. All the disappointment when he did not understand despite hours and hours of attempts at teaching him, and finally it is paying off. He is making progress. Slowly, sometimes painfully slow, but progress nonetheless. I'm anxious to see how he continues to grow. I'm so proud of him.
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Comments
every step counts
What a wonderful and encouraging blog Alaina. Every day you (and your entire family) are making the decision to take one step forward. This means you continue to make the decision to allow room in your life ....and in Jacob's life for:
Love
Hope
Success
Triumphs
Celebrations
Thank you for sharing Jacob's success and your heart with all of us!
Kent
thank you for sharing!
alaina, what encouragement! thank you for sharing with us... so many years of hard work and dedication.... keep it up and keep the faith! i love how you said jacob "wants to hug every chance he gets" :) also, i think about tyler and maddie- they are doing a great job as well- it's hard for them, and it sounds like they are really on board to do everything they can to love and support as well. what a fantastic family!
beautiful
This is a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing.
thank you for sharing
I to have a child with autism he's now 24 years old ( I also have 3 othere boys i have adopted that have fetal alcohal ) its not easy taking care of a child with autism but then theres also much joy and happiness in it .